I trust that God has given you strength and wisdom this week
for all that you had to do. No matter how hard the task seems, He can help you
through it.
Since I've been doing these letters, I have found that you
are on my mind and in my prayers more often than before. I can now mentally work
my way around the globe and remember each one of you.
As I continue my story, I will share that I claimed to have
been saved at a young age. Perhaps I was, but I didn't have a firm memory of
what I had done. In fact, the memory (or imagination) that I did think I had
was somewhat bizarre and didn't really make sense. I was a "good
kid," though, and didn't want to let anyone know that I wasn't sure I was
saved. Finally, at the age of thirteen, I realized it was far more important
what God thought than what anyone else thought. I prayed and asked God to save
me.
Both before and after that time, I was a good conformist. I
suppose there was a bit of pride in feeling like I could do and be what a good
Christian kid was supposed to do and be. I rarely got into any kind of trouble.
I think a bigger factor than pride, however, was that of fear. Due to the
discipline in my family, I was afraid to get into trouble. So I continued to
have the reputation of being a good kid, one of the few who really wanted to
follow God. To some extent, I did want to follow God, but it was only a concept
and something for the future. I didn't realize what that meant on a practical
level, and I had no real fire or zeal.
When I went to Bob Jones University, I had far more freedom
and independence than I had ever had before. I began to come out of my shell,
making friends and having fun. I didn't get into any real trouble, but I did
have some adventures that in retrospect were a little questionable - immature,
I suppose. With this freedom and the exploration of fun, I developed an
attitude that "No one can tell me what to do." I wasn't
overwhelmingly rebellious, but there was a hard streak that ran through me. I
still mostly followed the rules, but (in my mind) only because I chose to. I
chose conformity over consequences, but I was convinced that if I really wanted
to, I would do some wilder things. I didn't realize it at the time, but this self-centered
and stubborn thinking expressed itself in a hardness of my face.
As my sophomore year began, I was challenged in a preaching
service about whether my heart was truly right with God. I was not ready to
make a decision during the service itself, but I knew that I needed to do some
serious consideration. This was not a baby step for me; it was more like an
all-or-nothing moment. I knew that I could conform. I had done it for years. So
I wasn't about to take some little step to pretend I was closer to God. Instead,
I needed to change my entire focus. I needed a fundamental change in my heart.
I needed to fully dedicate myself to God and start actively seeking to please
Him and grow in Him.
I thank God that I took that step that night. I yielded my
will to God's will. One of the aspects of that was to start reading my Bible
for the first time in my life. I had read it in church and school, of course,
and with my family, but never on my own - maybe a handful of attempts that
lasted a few days. Those two aspects - yielding to God and reading His Word -
changed my life. I grew tremendously during that year, and the change was
noticeable to those around me. Now instead of doing right to avoid consequences
or to look good, I did so because I wanted to live for God.
I chose Romans 12:1 as my life verse. "Therefore I urge
you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy
sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship."
I finally realized that this is what practical Christianity was - giving myself
fully to God and serving Him.
I don't think my journey was unusual. Everyone has to come
to that point of surrender. I am convinced that real growth cannot happen
without surrender and without a healthy relationship with the Bible. I don't
know about around the world, but I know that in Christianity in general in
America, those two things are not nearly as common as they should be. Often
Christianity is almost an afterthought, something claimed as a foundation but
without great impact on the life.
What is my conclusion? First, to encourage you to be patient
with those you work with. Growth takes time. Even those who appear to be the
"good" prospects may not be ready yet for responsibilities. Until
their heart is really gripped and is truly given to God, they will be going
through the motions just like I was.
Second, show them how to love the Word. Let them see an
example of someone to whom the Bible really matters, and teach them how to
study it meaningfully. I'm amazed at how many people think that merely reading
a chapter (or a few verses) a day is considered serious devotions, and they
just don't know anything better.
Ministry in people is a long-term investment, filled with
highs and lows, progress and failure. So keep teaching, keep mentoring, keep
guiding, keep praying. Remember, what you do today matters for eternity. May
God show you glimpses of growth this week, both personally and in your
ministry.
Love in Christ,
Peggy HoltOpen Door Baptist Church
Lebanon, PA
www.dearmissionarylady.blogspot.com
www.pressingontohigherground.blogspot.com
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