05252019 Disappointment

Dear Missionary Lady,

On this Memorial Day weekend, we remember the U.S. soldiers who gave their lives in the service of their country. While ultimately their sacrifice contributed to victory, individually their loss was difficult for their family and friends, who were not able to welcome their loved ones home again after the war.

Disappointment can be hard to deal with.  Some disappointment comes when something we want doesn't happen. When we have looked forward to something, when our hearts have longed for it, and when our plans have rested on it, it is difficult to see our hope dashed. Other disappointment comes when something we didn't want does happen. A death, betrayal, abandonment, or failure can sicken our hearts as we feel the loss of opportunity or the waste of time invested.

We can be disappointed in ourselves, in others, in circumstances, but the one source where we can never direct our disappointment is to God. Our hearts can be tempted to be disappointed in God when He does not do what we want Him to do when we want Him to do it, but if we are thinking properly, we realize that we can never be disappointed in God.

The difficulty is that we know God is sovereign over all things, so when something bad happens (or something good doesn't happen), we want to assume it is God's fault. We forget there are other principles that also come into play.

For example, we live in an imperfect world. That's not God's fault; that's man's fault. We have damaged the perfect world He created, and sometimes those damages result in disappointment: broken health, death, natural disasters, weather-related challenges. These are part of life on this fallen planet.

There is also the concept of human sin and weakness. God has given man a free will. He doesn't want men to reject Him, but many do. The disappointment of a backslidden believer or a wayward child is not God's fault. Other people will fail us or won't be able to meet our expectations simply because they are imperfect.

There is also our own imperfection. Our disappointment might stem from a poor decision we made without godly wisdom. Maybe we impatiently rushed ahead of God or allowed our emotions to guide us. We can have an overall right heart with God and a fundamental desire to follow His plan, but still make human errors.

Disappointment comes from at least these reasons, but never because God fails. But there are situations where we might not be able to see one of those fallen sources as the reason for disappointment. Our evaluation shows that there is no reason why God could not have done as we expected; He just chose not to.

Ah, now the problem is that we don't think like God and, in fact, can't think like God. When we are disappointed, it means that we don't understand things the way God understands them. We don't know how He is working, and we don't see what He is going to accomplish. God will always do what He has promised, but sometimes we set our hopes on something that God has not promised - maybe a good thing, maybe a desired blessing - but maybe something that God never promised or intended to do.

"Why not?" we ask. "It would have been such a good thing." But God knows how to accomplish His purposes better than we do. His ways are not our ways. We don't even know specifically what God's purposes are in each situation. God is far more interested in producing Christ-likeness in us and in building our faith and in bringing glory to Himself than He is in working out specific life or ministry objectives. Sometimes His objectives are best accomplished through disappointment. It is so easy for us to focus on individual, temporal objectives, while God focuses on broader scale, eternal objectives.

And then there is this wonder. Even in and through the disappointments, God is working good. "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28). Within His plan, God uses even disappointments in ways that we may not see to bring about His good purposes. Sometimes that is so His later answer is so amazing that He receives even more praise. Sometimes it is because the godly character and endurance that He wants to work in us could not be accomplished any other way.

At any rate, God is always right in His character and in everything He ever does. God is always faithful. God never does the wrong thing or fails to do the right thing. Nothing slips past His oversight or control. His love will not allow His children to be hurt without purpose. Yes, disappointments come in life, but never let it be said, "God let me down." He can't do that.

While it is true that "Hope deferred maketh the heart sick" (Proverbs 13:12), it is also true that "He healeth the broken in heart and bindeth up their wounds" (Psalm 147:3). God cares very much about the hurts of our hearts, and the God who is love and the God of all comfort gives His healing and support in the hard times.

Did you face a disappointment this week? Can you rest in the wisdom of God? Can you heal through His love and comfort? Can you trust Him to do the right thing? Praise the God who is good and does good (Psalm 119:68).

Love in Christ,
Peggy Holt
member at Open Door Baptist Church in Lebanon, PA
www.pressingontohigherground.blogspot.com

05182019 Are You Okay?

Dear Missionary Lady,

Are you okay?

Have you ever had someone ask you that question, and you really didn't know how to answer? Most of the time it's not that hard, but there are days. You don't want to lie, but neither do you really want to give an honest answer, because the truth may be that you're not okay. In fact, you may be very far from okay - for very real and legitimate reasons. But if you tell someone that, who knows what they will think! And they're very likely to say words that will either minimize your struggle or challenge you to just get over it, or both.

At times like that, we all like to have a friend who will listen and sympathize and care and support. Who will acknowledge the difficulty and take it seriously. Who will be a friend and not a preacher.

My thoughts about this whole concept are going in a different direction, however, because I realize that Christians have a different perspective. Even when life is not okay, there is an extent to which it is okay. The external details might be rough, but the internal reality is safe and sure.

Remember Paul? He hadn't done anything wrong, except turn the world upside down with his preaching of the gospel. For that, people wanted to kill him. A group of forty men were so intent on that evil purpose that they vowed not even to eat until they had killed him. So began a new series of adventures. Paul was spirited away in the middle of the night by the army. He had several trials before important rulers who left him in prison just because they hoped they could get something from him. Eventually he was put on a ship to be sent to Italy.

Paul was still a prisoner. I don't think he had a lot of creature comforts, maybe not even spare clothing. To make things worse, the seas were stormy. He probably was seasick. The voyage was slow because of the wind, so the trip kept getting longer, and conditions on board kept deteriorating. People were starting to get smelly. Finally, they barely managed to make it into harbor, and it seemed that additional sailing would be impossible until spring.

After some time of being stranded, the pilot and captain were impatient and determined to sail on in spite of the risks. They ignored Paul's warning and set sail again. Soon they were caught in a storm that dwarfed all their previous problems. They had to give up even trying to steer the ship. They were trying desperately to hold the ship together and threw out their cargo and even parts of the ship's rigging. They hadn't seen the sun or stars for days, and all hope of survival was lost.

So in that dire situation, let's ask Paul, "Paul, are you okay?" What will his answer be? What should it be? Well, it would be easy to say he was not okay. Conditions were absolutely brutal. There was little chance of survival. And if the storm didn't kill him, the soldiers would have killed him without a second thought if it came down to that.

But Paul was okay, and his words showed it. He encouraged the other men on the ship to be of good cheer. He predicted no loss of life. He didn't say that everything would turn out okay, but he was confident that the people would be okay. Their situation was not as bleak as it seemed. He was optimistic.

How could Paul be okay in that situation? His crucial revelatory explanation is found in Acts 27:25: "For I believe God." Now Paul had a specific promise from God about his particular situation, but it still comes down to faith in God. Believing God, trusting God, having faith in God - that's what makes life be okay when it isn't okay.

The night might be dark and long. The tempest might be blowing. The tears might be flowing. The burden could be heavy. The questions could be swarming. The hole in our heart might be so big a tractor could drive through it. But even if it is the worst and hardest situation that we have ever faced in our lives, we are okay.

Why? Because we believe God. We are okay, because we believe God saved us. We are okay, because we believe God loves us. We are okay, because we believe God will take care of us. We are okay, because we believe God is completely in control. We are okay, because we believe God will never forsake us. We are okay, because we believe the Bible. We are okay, because we believe heaven is waiting.

I'm not trying to minimize the difficulty of the trial or the depth of the sorrow. Sure, humanly speaking no one who understands the situation would think that we are okay. But on a deeper and eternal level, we are indeed okay. There is an inner anchor. There is a solid rock. There is an eternal hope. There is a spiritual side to life that is far more important than the external and physical factors. Because of that, in the midst of times when life is not okay, we truly can be okay, and this knowledge can bring calmness, quietness, peace, and comfort in the midst of any disaster.

If your current troubles are small and few, praise God! If you happen to be in a time when the troubles and large and plenteous, believe God. May His dependable truth give you all the help and comfort you need for today and for this week. You really are okay!

Love in Christ,
Peggy Holt
member at Open Door Baptist Church in Lebanon, PA
www.pressingontohigherground.blogspot.com

05102019 Guilt Trips

Dear Missionary Lady,

Greetings in the name of our Savior. Happy Mother's Day to those of you who are mothers, and for those who are not, may God comfort you in His love and give you joy in remembering those in whom you have invested your love and guidance.

Any holiday can be difficult for those whom it excludes, and that is just one example of a time when Christians might struggle. I was thinking recently about those frustrating times of struggle. Women especially can face difficult emotional struggles, sometimes brief and intense, and other times prolonged and oppressive. Those times of challenge can be prompted by many things, perhaps most commonly by a trial or loss.

In general, people don't like to admit weakness, and for Christian leaders, this can be intensified. Such people can believe that showing any sign of struggle will result in loss of respect, loss of support, loss of opportunities, and maybe even loss of their ministries. Unfortunately, such people have often been put high upon a pedestal where they can easily have their every move examined; any wavering or cracking becomes grounds for abandoning or condemning them.

One's own expectations can sometimes be even more difficult than the expectations of others. Whether the trial is minor, like canceled plans that one had looked forward to, or major, like a serious health concern or family emergency, we often place unreasonable demands on ourselves. Based on the fact that we are Christians, or how long we have been Christians, or our leadership role, we think that we should be able to face trials without allowing them to affect us. We think that we shouldn't be this sad, this discouraged, this hurt, this pressured, etc. We expect ourselves to be mature enough to handle whatever comes in life without getting ruffled or perturbed.

I once did a Bible study about crying. I found that aside from a few situations of manipulative tears, crying is not recorded negatively in the Bible. It is matter-of-factly accepted as normal. Crying is merely the body's response (or outlet) for situations where the human body and/or spirit have been stretched beyond their limits.

Jesus' example readily reveals that God understands this. When Jesus saw the widow weeping over her son's death, He compassionately brought that son back to life (Luke 7). He sympathetically wept with Martha and Mary at the tomb of Lazarus (John 11). He had a precious interaction with Mary Magdalene after His resurrection (John 20). As she stood crying in the garden, He asked her, "Woman, why weepest thou?" These words were not accusation or rebuke. They were compassionate. The intent of His words could easily be translated "What's the matter?"

Still our minds protest against personal displays of frailty. We think of Paul and Silas, beaten and imprisoned, singing at midnight. We think of the disciples, who rejoiced at being counted worthy to suffer for the gospel. We want to know why we can't be like that.

God does sometimes give unusual grace to rise above some very difficult circumstances, but even those exemplary men sometimes struggled. The same Paul who sang in the prison also spoke of the struggle of his own earthen vessel: "We are troubled on every side ... we are perplexed ... persecuted ... cast down" (II Corinthians 4:7-9). The same Peter who rejoiced in persecution later acknowledged the reality of struggle: "Though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations" (I Peter 1:6). Even in those same verses, Paul and Peter declare that they were not utterly defeated; they had anchors of hope to cling to, but they did struggle, and they legitimized the struggle of others.

Yes, as Christians we should handle life's problems differently, but even as Christians, we are still human. We want to forget that, but God remembers it. God knows our frame, that we are only dust (Psalm 103:13-14). We are not brick or rock or steel. We are fragile.

We are also not alone. The same extraordinary grace that helped some to rise above very difficult trials is available to help all of us get through the troubles we face. God's grace is sufficient. He knows our weakness, and His response is that of compassion. He tells us to "come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need" (Hebrews 4:16). There is no distinction of whether that is a major life crisis or something minor that we think shouldn't bother us at all. Regardless of the intensity, if we are in a time of need, we need grace to help us through. God freely offers that grace and generously pours it out on us.

This concept is not an excuse for us to wallow in hurt or discouragement, nor does it mean that we shouldn't grow and mature, but it does provide some good perspective. It can keep us from despairing over our inability to rise above every trial. It can prevent us from going on a damaging and restricting guilt trip. It can protect us from being our own worst enemy by crippling our ability to minister because we deem ourselves unworthy.

Trials are too hard for us, but they are never too hard for God. We are frail, but God is strong. God knows our weakness, and He offers His abundant grace. May you be supported and upheld by His grace this week.

Love in Christ,
Peggy Holt
member at Open Door Baptist Church in Lebanon, PA
www.pressingontohigherground.blogspot.com

05042019 All the Way

Dear Missionary Lady,

"All the Way My Savior Leads Me" - this precious hymn, special because I have seen its truth powerfully illustrated throughout my life, has been in my thoughts recently. I know it has brought me to tears multiple times, usually when the path was particularly difficult but my heart still knew the words were true.

1. All the way my Savior leads me – What have I to ask beside?

Can I doubt His tender mercy, Who through life has been my Guide?
Heav’nly peace, divinest comfort, Here by faith in Him to dwell!
For I know, whate’er befall me, Jesus doeth all things well.

This first stanza is about faith and trust in a good and faithful God. That's not always easy, but the unshakeable truth is that it is always valid. The bottom line is that we can trust God every step and turn along the way. Yes, no matter what happens, He does all things well. "Thou art good, and doest good; teach me thy statutes" (Psalm 119:68).

2. All the way my Savior leads me, - Cheers each winding path I tread,

Gives me grace for ev’ry trial, Feeds me with the living bread.
Tho my weary steps may falter And my soul athirst may be,
Gushing from the Rock before me, Lo! a spring of joy I see.

The second stanza speaks of God's help and support on the journey. He is with us every step of the way - every day. God is not detached or ambivalent. No, He loves us, and He knows our weakness. When our strength is gone and even our desire to keep walking disappears, God gives comfort and grace, refreshment and provision. It is through Him that we can keep going. "In the day when I cried thou answeredst me, and strengthenedst me with strength in my soul" (Psalm 138:3).

3. All the way my Savior leads me – O the fullness of His love!

Perfect rest to me is promised In my Father’s house above.
When my spirit, clothed immortal, Wings its flight to realms of day,
This my song thru endless ages: Jesus led me all the way.

The third stanza talks about the glorious end of our journey. No matter what this life brings or where this life leads, we know our final destination. We know that someday the troubles of this life will be ended and everything will be made right. In the here and now, we sometimes question and doubt and forget, but when our journey is over, we will be able to say with confidence that God did indeed lead us all the way. "Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory" (Psalm 73:24).

Abraham's path was one of wandering. He obeyed God's guidance but never saw the fulfillment of most of the promises, except by faith.

Joseph's path was filled with bewildering setbacks. All he did was try to follow God and do right, but his path repeatedly took hard and unexpected turns.

Moses' path led him directly away from where he thought he could be used and into a long period of apparent uselessness. Finally, when God brought him into a place of service, he was opposed and challenged by the people he was supposed to help.

David's path was completely unexpected. The shepherd boy had no reason to even dream of being king. But his tumultuous path toward being king must have made it seem like God's promises would never come true.

Esther's path contained responsibility and danger that she never asked for.

Jeremiah's path was filled with opposition from absolutely everyone - except God.

Daniel's path, while not without difficult testing, led him higher than he probably ever expected to go.

Paul's path revolutionized his life, taking him from a position of power and prestige to a life of travel and persecution and deprivation.

We find elements of these Bible characters in our own stories. We face some of the same characteristics. Our faith gets challenged, life throws us curveballs, we face dry spells of waiting, our plans may seem impossible to achieve, we face unwanted risk, we experience opposition, we sometimes are placed in positions of leadership we never asked for, and our lives may be filled with trouble and resistance.

None of those things change the fact that God is leading. In fact, they are often the direct evidence and outworking of His leading. Whether we understand or not, and even whether we agree or not, God is doing exactly what He wants to do in our lives. He is guiding, and He guides with wisdom, love, and power. Such a good and faithful God is worthy of our trust and obedience. Our souls can be calmed in knowing that God is the one in control.

"And all the inhabitants of the earth are reputed as nothing: and he doeth according to his will in the army of heaven, and among the inhabitants of the earth: and none can stay his hand, or say unto him, What doest thou?" (Daniel 4:35).

This week may you rest confidently in His guidance. May you have comfort, grace, and strength for every challenge. May you be encouraged and motivated by the hope of heaven. All the way He has led you, and all the way He will continue to lead you. "When my spirit was overwhelmed within me, then thou knewedst my path" (Psalm 142:3). He knows your path - what has already passed, where you are now, and exactly where He will take you.

Love in Christ,
Peggy Holt
member at Open Door Baptist Church in Lebanon, PA
www.pressingontohigherground.blogspot.com